Dear god, this whole past couple of days has been hectic... a whirlwind of events-trying to stay positive through it all. I need to keep my focus on the three impt things well you are always number one of course but then school/Mcat, research, and then the thing and work. Those should always come first and nuthing should come in between to jeapardize that! Really because this is twice now even though the second was a school activity not School work but still it just shows me where i do and don't need to be. I understand now God and I apologize to you and myself for letting myself get caught up in that.
According to Psalm four, you hear me when I call and I appreciate that -you know when I need you and you are already here! you have relieved me in my distress- God be with me today give me a peace of mind. and then it goes to say how long will you love worthlessness and seek falsehood-SO true I should have known better and realized that the only thing I am thankful for is that the four of "them" past ks are safe and that I got my peeps home safe because I was the only one fit and able to drive. So those things I can be thankful for but it was a bunch of bad falsehood that ended up taking the place of something greater this morning. And that is the truth
wow god knows exactly what I am up to right now so the next verse is be angry and do not sin meditate within your heart on your bed and be still. Put your trust in the LORD. And that is the most important thing to do because the lord will put gladness in your heart and the verse ends with God giving me peace and making me safe!
Thanks God you know what I need to accomplish today but I can go about it with a peace of mind.... hw, test studying, it is afterall my school that takes precedence over all. Help me remember the important important things and I gotta go with them! What's been happening is NOT okay and I need to keep that in perspective and you have helped me now and I need to trust, believe and feed off of that!
Sunday, February 7, 2010
Friday, January 29, 2010
Book of Psalms
ITs the night of the 28th Friday and just want some more words of inspiration. So lately I have come to realize how much i am involved in and a part of and truly its by the Grace of God that I don't let it get to me BUT i must also remember what is IMPORTANT in college Grades and lord you know where I need to be and what I need to attain I really need to be focused mostly on that lord please help me get there. I love you god for being with me all this time and helping me remain positive!!!
Psalm 1 vs 3
great verse talks about how man shall be like a tree that produces great fruit and he will not wither in his efforts to reap fruit and whatever he does shall prosper. Just the motivation I need to find to be the best I can be and do it for God and trust him to multiply my efforts. I wish to prosper not only academically but in my efforts to reach my campus,help Haiti and others and inspire my brothers!
vs 4 is the direct contrast where the ungodly are blown away-aren't steady their life is chaotic and never stable which is why it is important to put god first- he is my ROCK
vs5
therefore the ungodly nor sinners stand a chance with regards to judgement. there is a difference and it is very noticeable. identify your motives and make sure they are the right ones and be cautious of those who have those alterior intentions
vs 6 God knows his people
he knows the way of the righteous you can't fool him and say oh but i didn't mean it like that or god you know I still believe in you but I just make intentional mistakes sometimes-no excuse he knows the behavior and manner of those who love him and devote their life to him and as a christian I think that is something we all have to strive towards- adopting the behavior and mentality of christ- i know i have to in specific areas and I won't even deny it or make excuses for it! Just pray to God that he will help me in that area and give me the resilience and resolve i need
Psalm 2 vs 1-4 talks about how nations plot war against each other and how foolish it is for men to desire power so much that they end up losing the tru meaning of God and of humanity and just yearning for something that will end up in destructive means. Just look at history and the past and how nations have fallen subject to dictators that have brought despair and ruin to their countries all because of their greed. The rest of psalm two talks about the importance of serving in fear of God and with the utmost respect and giving him the glory for the success of a nation, not desiring more but trusting in god to provide more which he will you just have to believe THAT "blessed are those who put their trust in him" God I put my trust in you to carry me through be with me and help me out in the end i know you have big plans for me God and i thank you and never let me forget the greatness of your power and glory.
Priyanka
Psalm 1 vs 3
great verse talks about how man shall be like a tree that produces great fruit and he will not wither in his efforts to reap fruit and whatever he does shall prosper. Just the motivation I need to find to be the best I can be and do it for God and trust him to multiply my efforts. I wish to prosper not only academically but in my efforts to reach my campus,help Haiti and others and inspire my brothers!
vs 4 is the direct contrast where the ungodly are blown away-aren't steady their life is chaotic and never stable which is why it is important to put god first- he is my ROCK
vs5
therefore the ungodly nor sinners stand a chance with regards to judgement. there is a difference and it is very noticeable. identify your motives and make sure they are the right ones and be cautious of those who have those alterior intentions
vs 6 God knows his people
he knows the way of the righteous you can't fool him and say oh but i didn't mean it like that or god you know I still believe in you but I just make intentional mistakes sometimes-no excuse he knows the behavior and manner of those who love him and devote their life to him and as a christian I think that is something we all have to strive towards- adopting the behavior and mentality of christ- i know i have to in specific areas and I won't even deny it or make excuses for it! Just pray to God that he will help me in that area and give me the resilience and resolve i need
Psalm 2 vs 1-4 talks about how nations plot war against each other and how foolish it is for men to desire power so much that they end up losing the tru meaning of God and of humanity and just yearning for something that will end up in destructive means. Just look at history and the past and how nations have fallen subject to dictators that have brought despair and ruin to their countries all because of their greed. The rest of psalm two talks about the importance of serving in fear of God and with the utmost respect and giving him the glory for the success of a nation, not desiring more but trusting in god to provide more which he will you just have to believe THAT "blessed are those who put their trust in him" God I put my trust in you to carry me through be with me and help me out in the end i know you have big plans for me God and i thank you and never let me forget the greatness of your power and glory.
Priyanka
Thursday, January 28, 2010
The Book of Psalms
The Book of Psalms is an inspirational piece full of allegorical, visual, literary metaphors and wisdom. I would like to do an in depth study by reading and analyzing and referring to reliable sources as to the meaning of God's book. This will be done throughout the course of the year to strengthen my resolve in God, help me get through my busy life and excel coming out on top!
Psalm 1and 2
Blessed is the man who walks not in the counsel of the ungodly nor stands in the path of sinners nor sits in the seat of the scornful; but his delight is in the law of the Lord and in his law he meditates day and night.
This is where Christians differ from the rest of the world. You can't be afraid to be different and take a stance for the things you believe in. this reminds me of what mike told me the other day about listening to the Brittany spears song 3 where she says living in sin is the new thing-well it might be but that is why christians have to truly TRULY set themselves apart from the worldly things by not being of this world and not partaking in the things that sinners partake in. SET yourself APART in GODS IMAGE.
the second verse in his law he meditates night and day this is important for us as christians to remember. just going to church and believing is not enough to maintain that strong enough resolve in the lord. It is important to have a constant communicative relationship with him and read the BIBLE his word!!!!
Priyanka
Bible verse of the day :
Phillipians 4:13-I can do all things through christ who strenghtens me.
Psalm 1and 2
Blessed is the man who walks not in the counsel of the ungodly nor stands in the path of sinners nor sits in the seat of the scornful; but his delight is in the law of the Lord and in his law he meditates day and night.
This is where Christians differ from the rest of the world. You can't be afraid to be different and take a stance for the things you believe in. this reminds me of what mike told me the other day about listening to the Brittany spears song 3 where she says living in sin is the new thing-well it might be but that is why christians have to truly TRULY set themselves apart from the worldly things by not being of this world and not partaking in the things that sinners partake in. SET yourself APART in GODS IMAGE.
the second verse in his law he meditates night and day this is important for us as christians to remember. just going to church and believing is not enough to maintain that strong enough resolve in the lord. It is important to have a constant communicative relationship with him and read the BIBLE his word!!!!
Priyanka
Bible verse of the day :
Phillipians 4:13-I can do all things through christ who strenghtens me.
Wednesday, January 13, 2010
Jan 12th Bible Time
Ephesians 4:23- Renewed mind and renewed spirit in God
What does it mean to have a renewed mind? a renewed spirit?
A renewed mind is one re-energized refocused on God and filled with his word and conviction. Are you thinking the right things, is your mind RIGHT? Are you in the right place today and are your goals God oriented what he wants for your life? Do you have that conscience that helps you disseminate between what is right and wrong. Today God I ask you for that continual renewal of my mind in you to help me and give me peace and understanding in every situation. You know my stresses and burdens and the overwhelming feeling I feel when thinking about all that needs to be done and how it will get done but I believe that you God have that power that will help me decide what to do and get it done accordingly. Thanks!
Renewed spirit is the energy you have for God and worshiping and spending time in his presence. God I want to keep this blog up for you this energy that I have for spending time and making you a daily part of my life because you in my life makes things that less stressful and clears things up for me. I know you have amazing plans and I will put those burdens that I have about whether I will be able to engage in them upon you I know all the odds are against me right now but YOU will make something happen and I need to KNOW this. So Lord please be with me and help me with my downhearted feelings about applying to these programs-give me a renewed spirit to complete the applications and a new sense of direction and motivation and strength from you!
Thanks God
What does it mean to have a renewed mind? a renewed spirit?
A renewed mind is one re-energized refocused on God and filled with his word and conviction. Are you thinking the right things, is your mind RIGHT? Are you in the right place today and are your goals God oriented what he wants for your life? Do you have that conscience that helps you disseminate between what is right and wrong. Today God I ask you for that continual renewal of my mind in you to help me and give me peace and understanding in every situation. You know my stresses and burdens and the overwhelming feeling I feel when thinking about all that needs to be done and how it will get done but I believe that you God have that power that will help me decide what to do and get it done accordingly. Thanks!
Renewed spirit is the energy you have for God and worshiping and spending time in his presence. God I want to keep this blog up for you this energy that I have for spending time and making you a daily part of my life because you in my life makes things that less stressful and clears things up for me. I know you have amazing plans and I will put those burdens that I have about whether I will be able to engage in them upon you I know all the odds are against me right now but YOU will make something happen and I need to KNOW this. So Lord please be with me and help me with my downhearted feelings about applying to these programs-give me a renewed spirit to complete the applications and a new sense of direction and motivation and strength from you!
Thanks God
Monday, January 11, 2010
Cleansing for Personal Renewal part 2
Although I do not have a copy of the bible in front of me I will still write the verses down for personal reference.
Today I read through Phillipians 3:14-17 or 18 and it talked about God's / Jesus' holiness and following his way.
I am sending this copy of the cleansing guide to D in the hopes that he will read it and analyze himself before God.
5. Romans 12:1-2 YOUR MIND
I need to maintain this knowledge of God's word and fill myself with his voice and his teachings and influence because if I let myself get to sidetracked by what is going on in the world I will become a part of it-trapped by it and pull further away from God until I have messed it up for myself because I thought I could do things without God. God help me to continue to do this bible reflection and devotion time and even if I don't blog it everyday, if I am reading your word that is major improvement and help me keep open those lines of communication between you and I and pray regularly and keep you more in tune with my life- I AM NEVER TOO BUSY FOR GOD.
6. Acts 20:35 YOUR MONEY AND POSSESSIONS
I have to let my possession ALL of them earthly and human GO and give it up to God because he made them, they belong to him and he may have his way with them for his own will and purpose in mine or someone else's life. I can't let the money get to me or make being successful or pushing hard about the rewards of money-yes it is nice to have some so as to live comfortably and provide but I cannot make it my life and this will be more of something I pray to avoid in the future when I hopefully do make that money, but again I really can't worry about that-God will take care of my financial situations- especially the one right now in Miami and after I graduate. Help me with those lord.
7. 1 Corinthians 6:19-20 YOUR BODY
I shouldn't be careless and distasteful with my body I should take care of it and make sure to keep myself disciplined and take pride in what God created-not pollute it by engaging in certain activities such as drinking drugs or sex. Help me abstain from these things Lord because I know they don't please you. I know for a fact that I have conviction not to engage in them but only you can help me in the areas that need help. Only you know my heart and my soul and accept me and forgive me because of who Jesus is.
8. 2 Corinthians 5:7 WALKING BY FAITH
I can't just focus on my circumstances instead of God. I can't let my moods and feelings dictate what I am going to do I have to turn these matters over to HIM so that he can take care of it like he promised. I should always remember to trust in my God to see me through and provide an opportunity or lesson or whatever that will always be in my best interest. Help me understand why things happen and accept them and deal with them and to stop worrying and stressing about tomorrow. Be with me in all this lord as I know you are and GIVE me that PEACE in my soul.
9. HebrewAcs 10:25 YOUR CHURCH FAMILY AND MINISTRY
Can't expect to be fed without giving back. Remember the importance of fellowship and prayer with other believers and being held accountable.
10. Joshua 24:15 YOUR FAMILY
Family is very important to me lord. Help me to be patient and understanding with them and continue to strongly love them after all they are what I have in this life as a sure thing. Be with my dad and my mom and their issues and problems, be with Davin, so motivated so young, be with Tila, so hurt I know, be with Nagymami with her osteoporosis and Napa with his condition and all my relatives who don't know you lord. Pray for D and his family Lord bless them they are sooo Good to me.
11. Acts 20:24 YOUR MISSION IN THE WORLD
Let me not ever forget you have a purpose for me. My profession is meant to serve your mission your will. And I need to share your love every chance I get-emanate you from every pore and keep talking about you with others so that they too may want to know and come to know and let others know. Help me be strong in my faith and be prepared for battle with your shield, breastplate of righteousness, sword etc. Armor of God.
ASK GOD TO REMIND YOU OF ANYTHING THAT HAS HINDERED HIS BLESSING ON YOUR LIFE.
1 John 1:9 If we confess our sins to God, He can be depended upon to forgive us and to cleanse us from EVERY wrong.
Prayer:
Dear God,
Be with me right now. I decided I will wait on Orgo but I still would like to talk to my advisor and V about it. I need to make sure I am doing the right thing but I have a feeling I am. I feel like you are going to be here with me and I just can't rush these things- I need and should take my time and listen to you and you will provide a way lord I know it!!!
I still need to email them and Darren and Prof and see how they are doing and mail off two things tomorrow and Lord I know there is a deadline and several others approaching- BY UR WILL let things be done you know what I want out of it lord. Give me strength and wisdom and energy to finish as I am very tired right now.
Thanks for being here and thanks for tonights phone call but be with him lord and everyone and Mike with his opportunity-nourish that. Be with everyone around me and Dr. Aiken and Watson Clinic and Jenny and Crispers and all the workers there. Be with me because I BELIEVE you will be!!!
Pri
Today I read through Phillipians 3:14-17 or 18 and it talked about God's / Jesus' holiness and following his way.
I am sending this copy of the cleansing guide to D in the hopes that he will read it and analyze himself before God.
5. Romans 12:1-2 YOUR MIND
I need to maintain this knowledge of God's word and fill myself with his voice and his teachings and influence because if I let myself get to sidetracked by what is going on in the world I will become a part of it-trapped by it and pull further away from God until I have messed it up for myself because I thought I could do things without God. God help me to continue to do this bible reflection and devotion time and even if I don't blog it everyday, if I am reading your word that is major improvement and help me keep open those lines of communication between you and I and pray regularly and keep you more in tune with my life- I AM NEVER TOO BUSY FOR GOD.
6. Acts 20:35 YOUR MONEY AND POSSESSIONS
I have to let my possession ALL of them earthly and human GO and give it up to God because he made them, they belong to him and he may have his way with them for his own will and purpose in mine or someone else's life. I can't let the money get to me or make being successful or pushing hard about the rewards of money-yes it is nice to have some so as to live comfortably and provide but I cannot make it my life and this will be more of something I pray to avoid in the future when I hopefully do make that money, but again I really can't worry about that-God will take care of my financial situations- especially the one right now in Miami and after I graduate. Help me with those lord.
7. 1 Corinthians 6:19-20 YOUR BODY
I shouldn't be careless and distasteful with my body I should take care of it and make sure to keep myself disciplined and take pride in what God created-not pollute it by engaging in certain activities such as drinking drugs or sex. Help me abstain from these things Lord because I know they don't please you. I know for a fact that I have conviction not to engage in them but only you can help me in the areas that need help. Only you know my heart and my soul and accept me and forgive me because of who Jesus is.
8. 2 Corinthians 5:7 WALKING BY FAITH
I can't just focus on my circumstances instead of God. I can't let my moods and feelings dictate what I am going to do I have to turn these matters over to HIM so that he can take care of it like he promised. I should always remember to trust in my God to see me through and provide an opportunity or lesson or whatever that will always be in my best interest. Help me understand why things happen and accept them and deal with them and to stop worrying and stressing about tomorrow. Be with me in all this lord as I know you are and GIVE me that PEACE in my soul.
9. HebrewAcs 10:25 YOUR CHURCH FAMILY AND MINISTRY
Can't expect to be fed without giving back. Remember the importance of fellowship and prayer with other believers and being held accountable.
10. Joshua 24:15 YOUR FAMILY
Family is very important to me lord. Help me to be patient and understanding with them and continue to strongly love them after all they are what I have in this life as a sure thing. Be with my dad and my mom and their issues and problems, be with Davin, so motivated so young, be with Tila, so hurt I know, be with Nagymami with her osteoporosis and Napa with his condition and all my relatives who don't know you lord. Pray for D and his family Lord bless them they are sooo Good to me.
11. Acts 20:24 YOUR MISSION IN THE WORLD
Let me not ever forget you have a purpose for me. My profession is meant to serve your mission your will. And I need to share your love every chance I get-emanate you from every pore and keep talking about you with others so that they too may want to know and come to know and let others know. Help me be strong in my faith and be prepared for battle with your shield, breastplate of righteousness, sword etc. Armor of God.
ASK GOD TO REMIND YOU OF ANYTHING THAT HAS HINDERED HIS BLESSING ON YOUR LIFE.
1 John 1:9 If we confess our sins to God, He can be depended upon to forgive us and to cleanse us from EVERY wrong.
Prayer:
Dear God,
Be with me right now. I decided I will wait on Orgo but I still would like to talk to my advisor and V about it. I need to make sure I am doing the right thing but I have a feeling I am. I feel like you are going to be here with me and I just can't rush these things- I need and should take my time and listen to you and you will provide a way lord I know it!!!
I still need to email them and Darren and Prof and see how they are doing and mail off two things tomorrow and Lord I know there is a deadline and several others approaching- BY UR WILL let things be done you know what I want out of it lord. Give me strength and wisdom and energy to finish as I am very tired right now.
Thanks for being here and thanks for tonights phone call but be with him lord and everyone and Mike with his opportunity-nourish that. Be with everyone around me and Dr. Aiken and Watson Clinic and Jenny and Crispers and all the workers there. Be with me because I BELIEVE you will be!!!
Pri
Sunday, January 10, 2010
Cleansing for Personal Renewal
The following is the first half of a list and personal analysis of common sins that prevent God from blessing and using my life. It is this list that I must personally consult when examining myself and my relationship with God.
Search me, O God, and know my heart: test my thoughts. Point out anything you find in me that [causes dissapointment] and lead me along the path of everlasting life. Psalm 139:23-4
How can I ever know what sins are lurking in my heart? Cleanse me from these hidden faults. Psalm 19:12
1. Matthew 6:12-14 YOUR RELATIONSHIP TO OTHERS
I should never harbor feelings of hatred or anger or resentment towards anyone. I should never be critical of anyone or wear a self protective mask that doesn't allow others to get close to me. No matter what may happen God, help me keep an open mind when it comes to all and anyone that I may encounter in my life. Help me to be positive upbeat, kind and compassionate and to no matter what hurt I have been through not allow myself to punish others for what circumstances I have had in my life. Help me be understanding and trust in you and lean on you for my comfort so that I can build these healthy relationships and maintain them and most importantly I NEED HEALTHY relationships. Help me abstain from the unhealthy ones that would jeapardize everything and to touch those people Lord.
Especially help my relationship with D.
And forgive us our debts as we forgive our debtors.and lead us not into temptation but deliver us from evil. For thine is the kingdom and the power and the glory forever, Amen. For if ye forgive men their trespasses your heavenly Father will also forgive you.
So just as the bible says I should always maintain this mindset when approaching others and in keeping good terms with everyone. I am already practicing this and I maintain this forgiving attitude but help me keep that and not lose this non-judgemental stance. Help me NEVER think I am superior to anyone because that is unjust and very beneath what God expects from me and what I expect from myself. Even if I become successful let me never forget my struggle to get there and all the little people in the background that made it happen.
2. Matthew 6:33 YOUR PRIORITIES
But seek ye first the kingdom of God and his righteousness and all these things shall be [given] unto you. Also vs 34- Be therefore not anxious about tomorrow; for tomorrow will be anzious for the things of itself(tomorrow will take care of itself) Sufficient unto the day is its own evil.
Make sure God is being put first in my life. Everything I do needs to be done for him in his name for his will in my life. I need to make sure that what I am doing with my life is what God wants for me is what he meant it to be. And I always need to make time for God even if its five minutes in the morning I need to make sure I set aside that time to show that he is important he makes my day and so therefore I need to acknowledge that and appreciate him for it. God help me make time for you and praying more and reading my bible. I want to go to a good church in miami but you know my situation is there a way where I can be more regular about creating my own kind of worship etc so as to honor you and worship you. I love church and I miss it when I go away and only you Lord can give me the knowledge and the message- I would love that. Lord I also can't make other things a priority I have to be willing to give it up for the greater good for you!
3. Ephesians 4:31 ATTITUDES
Let all bitterness and wrath and anger and clamor and evil speaking be put away from you with all malice. and be kind to one another...even as God for christs sake hath forgiven you.
Lord help me to stop complaining all the time that shouldn't be my outlook on life. I shouldn't be ungrateful irritable or cranky. Help me be more loving and understanding towards Davin and the rest of my family. Help me and give me the patience to not smart or back answer people. Help me remain strong and give me that self control to hold my tongue. THE NEGATIVITY needs to stop I NEED to believe in myself and my abilities and stop looking around me and look at me and figure out what works best for me. Should I drop orgo and take something easier would I be able to handle it? Am I going to make it in any of these summer programs? Should I maintain positivity and believe in myself that I will make it? These are the struggles I deal with everyday that give me stress and lack of hope. I want to be a doctor- I know I do I feel it It gives me joy I want to do it for others and for you. Lord is there no other way show me if this is what you want for me. I need to make it and you know where I stand academically. Also financially I don't understand the increased due balance it is a struggle I face every semester but only you can fix that and therefore I am going to LEAVE it to you now lord. God I need to learn to stop trying to be so independent and trust you with things and learn to put my pride down and ask for help. I need to rely on you to be that number one shining star and the backbone behind my own shine. you are the one that can help me get through and I need to remember that even when I feel like all the weight is on my shoulders because it's not.
4. Colossians 3:9 INTEGRITY
Lord I know I am an honor council member and that definitely helps me stay in check and keep others in check. It makes me more aware of my responsibilities and my image and role model position for my younger brothers. Help me never to lie about classes or give an exaggerated view of my life instead I should maintain quietness if I don't want to share my grade. People will respect that more than a lie and I will also respect that more. I need to make sure I keep my promises and am dependable and don't say one thing doing another. No hypocrisy or fakeness. I want to keep it real and I know I need to constantly improve but Lord you are going to help me do that so there is no reason why I should be afraid or worried about what others think. I should just focus on being the best me that I can be.
Lie not to one another seeing htat ye have put off the old man with his deeds--vs10--and have put on the new man that is renewed in knowledge after the image of him that created him.
GOD CAN RENEW YOU but there has to be some PErSONAL initiative and EFFORT involved.
Prayer:
Lord today I give you my burdens and troubles and stresses and worries and although I have little time I know that you will help me accomplish all I need to accomplish within that time and take away that stress I feel whenever it gets to be too much and I get too tired of it. I never want to lost that positive demeanor and energy I have and that is what often gets me through. let me not lose hope focus or motivation on my dream because I know that you are here with me every step of the way and that is all I ever need anyway. you can heal my broken heart and cease the pain like a surgeon sutures the wound. I know that I need help with my classes like physics and biostats and spanish and the research will take time lord and that is why I don't know about organic chem and so I am asking you for guidance on whether I should wait and take polysci now. It will ensure a higher gpa and that is most important to me lord and also that the honors program won't just kick me out-lord you know my personal struggles with this school business but if you can make something happen prepare me and allow me to still pursue my initiatives and experiences that I desire than you won't be disappointed with the outcome. help me keep that motivation and I want to be the best the absolute BEST that I can demand from myself. School is more important than the other things and just allow me to balance women's history month-doing a good job and allowing myself the room to grow and learn from this and link community service and honor council and toppel and continue p100 tours and not leave schoolwork for the last minute help me to strengthen my time management because then there will be no need for worrying about when this or that will get taken care of which is why lord I ask you again for the answer to whether I should still do organic now or wait till the fall and then take it with physics two and then do genetics in the spring but really start studying harder for the mcat even without the organic chem background I can still study and then go hard before I take the test hopefully in july of the following year and please lord I wouldn't want it to mess up my application schedule and allow me to be able to get the reference letters I need and to have them be good and build stronger relationships with teachers and then biochem take that in the fall of senior year and for medical schools to see that and be okay with it lord. I know you can help me with all of this and so that is why this whole thing is a novel. These things are the things on my mind but I know that I am giving them to you-make out of them what you will and lead me in the direction you want for me and I willingly follow. THANKS GOD!!!
Search me, O God, and know my heart: test my thoughts. Point out anything you find in me that [causes dissapointment] and lead me along the path of everlasting life. Psalm 139:23-4
How can I ever know what sins are lurking in my heart? Cleanse me from these hidden faults. Psalm 19:12
1. Matthew 6:12-14 YOUR RELATIONSHIP TO OTHERS
I should never harbor feelings of hatred or anger or resentment towards anyone. I should never be critical of anyone or wear a self protective mask that doesn't allow others to get close to me. No matter what may happen God, help me keep an open mind when it comes to all and anyone that I may encounter in my life. Help me to be positive upbeat, kind and compassionate and to no matter what hurt I have been through not allow myself to punish others for what circumstances I have had in my life. Help me be understanding and trust in you and lean on you for my comfort so that I can build these healthy relationships and maintain them and most importantly I NEED HEALTHY relationships. Help me abstain from the unhealthy ones that would jeapardize everything and to touch those people Lord.
Especially help my relationship with D.
And forgive us our debts as we forgive our debtors.and lead us not into temptation but deliver us from evil. For thine is the kingdom and the power and the glory forever, Amen. For if ye forgive men their trespasses your heavenly Father will also forgive you.
So just as the bible says I should always maintain this mindset when approaching others and in keeping good terms with everyone. I am already practicing this and I maintain this forgiving attitude but help me keep that and not lose this non-judgemental stance. Help me NEVER think I am superior to anyone because that is unjust and very beneath what God expects from me and what I expect from myself. Even if I become successful let me never forget my struggle to get there and all the little people in the background that made it happen.
2. Matthew 6:33 YOUR PRIORITIES
But seek ye first the kingdom of God and his righteousness and all these things shall be [given] unto you. Also vs 34- Be therefore not anxious about tomorrow; for tomorrow will be anzious for the things of itself(tomorrow will take care of itself) Sufficient unto the day is its own evil.
Make sure God is being put first in my life. Everything I do needs to be done for him in his name for his will in my life. I need to make sure that what I am doing with my life is what God wants for me is what he meant it to be. And I always need to make time for God even if its five minutes in the morning I need to make sure I set aside that time to show that he is important he makes my day and so therefore I need to acknowledge that and appreciate him for it. God help me make time for you and praying more and reading my bible. I want to go to a good church in miami but you know my situation is there a way where I can be more regular about creating my own kind of worship etc so as to honor you and worship you. I love church and I miss it when I go away and only you Lord can give me the knowledge and the message- I would love that. Lord I also can't make other things a priority I have to be willing to give it up for the greater good for you!
3. Ephesians 4:31 ATTITUDES
Let all bitterness and wrath and anger and clamor and evil speaking be put away from you with all malice. and be kind to one another...even as God for christs sake hath forgiven you.
Lord help me to stop complaining all the time that shouldn't be my outlook on life. I shouldn't be ungrateful irritable or cranky. Help me be more loving and understanding towards Davin and the rest of my family. Help me and give me the patience to not smart or back answer people. Help me remain strong and give me that self control to hold my tongue. THE NEGATIVITY needs to stop I NEED to believe in myself and my abilities and stop looking around me and look at me and figure out what works best for me. Should I drop orgo and take something easier would I be able to handle it? Am I going to make it in any of these summer programs? Should I maintain positivity and believe in myself that I will make it? These are the struggles I deal with everyday that give me stress and lack of hope. I want to be a doctor- I know I do I feel it It gives me joy I want to do it for others and for you. Lord is there no other way show me if this is what you want for me. I need to make it and you know where I stand academically. Also financially I don't understand the increased due balance it is a struggle I face every semester but only you can fix that and therefore I am going to LEAVE it to you now lord. God I need to learn to stop trying to be so independent and trust you with things and learn to put my pride down and ask for help. I need to rely on you to be that number one shining star and the backbone behind my own shine. you are the one that can help me get through and I need to remember that even when I feel like all the weight is on my shoulders because it's not.
4. Colossians 3:9 INTEGRITY
Lord I know I am an honor council member and that definitely helps me stay in check and keep others in check. It makes me more aware of my responsibilities and my image and role model position for my younger brothers. Help me never to lie about classes or give an exaggerated view of my life instead I should maintain quietness if I don't want to share my grade. People will respect that more than a lie and I will also respect that more. I need to make sure I keep my promises and am dependable and don't say one thing doing another. No hypocrisy or fakeness. I want to keep it real and I know I need to constantly improve but Lord you are going to help me do that so there is no reason why I should be afraid or worried about what others think. I should just focus on being the best me that I can be.
Lie not to one another seeing htat ye have put off the old man with his deeds--vs10--and have put on the new man that is renewed in knowledge after the image of him that created him.
GOD CAN RENEW YOU but there has to be some PErSONAL initiative and EFFORT involved.
Prayer:
Lord today I give you my burdens and troubles and stresses and worries and although I have little time I know that you will help me accomplish all I need to accomplish within that time and take away that stress I feel whenever it gets to be too much and I get too tired of it. I never want to lost that positive demeanor and energy I have and that is what often gets me through. let me not lose hope focus or motivation on my dream because I know that you are here with me every step of the way and that is all I ever need anyway. you can heal my broken heart and cease the pain like a surgeon sutures the wound. I know that I need help with my classes like physics and biostats and spanish and the research will take time lord and that is why I don't know about organic chem and so I am asking you for guidance on whether I should wait and take polysci now. It will ensure a higher gpa and that is most important to me lord and also that the honors program won't just kick me out-lord you know my personal struggles with this school business but if you can make something happen prepare me and allow me to still pursue my initiatives and experiences that I desire than you won't be disappointed with the outcome. help me keep that motivation and I want to be the best the absolute BEST that I can demand from myself. School is more important than the other things and just allow me to balance women's history month-doing a good job and allowing myself the room to grow and learn from this and link community service and honor council and toppel and continue p100 tours and not leave schoolwork for the last minute help me to strengthen my time management because then there will be no need for worrying about when this or that will get taken care of which is why lord I ask you again for the answer to whether I should still do organic now or wait till the fall and then take it with physics two and then do genetics in the spring but really start studying harder for the mcat even without the organic chem background I can still study and then go hard before I take the test hopefully in july of the following year and please lord I wouldn't want it to mess up my application schedule and allow me to be able to get the reference letters I need and to have them be good and build stronger relationships with teachers and then biochem take that in the fall of senior year and for medical schools to see that and be okay with it lord. I know you can help me with all of this and so that is why this whole thing is a novel. These things are the things on my mind but I know that I am giving them to you-make out of them what you will and lead me in the direction you want for me and I willingly follow. THANKS GOD!!!
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